It is summer, windows are open and the house flies have returned. They are not affected by the coronavirus. Fortunately they do not seem to be carriers either.
Based on past experience, fly swatters are kept available in every room.
Of course they reincarnate, so just swatting them only brings temporary relief. My efforts have now advanced to trying to disrupt their reincarnation process. Empirical evidence suggests that the following actions can gain a few minutes respite even if they cannot stop reincarnation.
- Wrap the swatted fly in tissue and throw into a waste paper basket
- Wrap the swatted fly in tissue and throw into a waste paper basket in another room
- Mash the swatted fly and wrap in tissue and dispose of in a waste paper basket in another room
- Mash the swatted fly and wrap in tissue and aluminium foil and dispose of in a waste paper basket in another room (based on the hypothesis that the foil disrupts after-death communications)
These actions have gained some respite from recurrent fly attacks, ranging from a few minutes up to an hour when foil-wrapping is employed.
However my latest efforts now involve:
- swatting the fly,
- mashing it,
- wrapping in tissue,
- further covering with foil into a tight wad, and
- flushing down the toilet.
This seems to work.
Of course it may just be that the reincarnation is shifted to somewhere else along the sewage system.
I swat them here, I swat them there,
My wife, she swats them everywhere,
Are they immortal? Are they from hell?
Those damnable Musca domesticels
